2.

Mental checkup.

How are we feeling today?
I guess not so great.

Today's been tough and long. I'm constantly tired.
I guess working two full time jobs and managing my brain is not as easy as I like believing, but I don't think it should be this fucking hard.

How can I stay on top of the mental game?
I can read all about it. I try yoga and running, esting healthy, drinking less, breathing more, making lists, but it's all for nothing.

Maybe I should see another therapist but I'm too fearful of starting over with another stramger, and my last experience was so crappy I'm terrified of another judgy lady.
I should definitely sleep more but how can I if all i need is more time.
Maybe I need a babysitter to tell me to sleep and drag me to take care of myself as I actually should.

Crying from exhaustion is getting natural.
I'm spiraling down to a point where I start thinking that maybe it's always going to be too much for me. I'm hopeful for the future, and over all I guess I'm happy.
But man, I'm tired of living inside of this brain.